the drawing board of Derek Kirk Kim

[This post was originally written in my private
journal on 8-31-07, a couple weeks after my latest book, Good As
, had hit bookstores.]




stopped by my local Barnes & Noble this afternoon to see how Good As
was doing. This particular Barnes & Noble is a mid-sized one
with 2 floors and an escalator. It’s mammoth. On my way out, I was coming down
the escalator, gazing out at the endless battalions of shelves. As I was being
slowly lowered into this vast ocean of books, it really hit me what a
microscopic portion of this world I really was. What a pointless, insignificant
drop in the bucket my little book was. Just another book among millions. Nothing
special – a simple-minded diversion, at best. Am I so egotistical to believe
that someone should choose my book over the hundreds and thousands of books in
that store? Does my book even deserve to be read when someone
could fill his or her mind, imagination, and spirit with The Catcher in the
or American Born Chinese or Carl Sagan’s Cosmos
instead? How can I expect someone to dish out their hard-earned,
minimum-wage money on the drivel that is my writing when there are so many – SO
MANY – books they could read instead. It’s truly a blessing – a
miracle, really! – that any of my books sell at all. It’s easy to
forget that.


and not one copy of Good As Lily had been sold, just in case you were